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Sunday, January 31, 2010

Have a nice day!...



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Tremendous Painting Collection


 


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BMW Bikes 2009


 

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Computer Problems and Technical Support Guys



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Ileana


 


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CD in drive
Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just doesn't work. What am I doing wrong?
Tech support: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive, right?
Customer: Yes.
Tech support: And what sort of computer are you using?
Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises. Listen!
Tech support: OK, I see Aaaa!

White Comp
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...

Icon on Left
Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?


Printer Problem
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

Password
Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.

AntiVirus Program
Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

Screen Saver
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
Weird Computer Problems and Tech Support



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Plane you can drive on road



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Jessica Simpson



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Train in Heaven Like Waterfall



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Neha Dhupia‏




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Tanushree Dutta



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Saturday, January 30, 2010

~ Asin ~



Ileana -II







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Ileana -1




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Santa and Banta



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Golden Age of commercial aviation


 


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Santa: I have swallowed a key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.

------------ --------- --------- ----
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell. Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn't come back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else?
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there. You
know
why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..
------------ --------- --------- ----
Ultimate answer while changing the job.
Interviewer: Why did you change your last job?
Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell me where.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying
furiously...
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa wanted to make a STD.. call to Punjab,
He wanted to save money so what did he do?
Simple, he went to Punjab and made a local call.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Oye paaji, apni pregnant wife ko itne dard mein hospital ki jagah pizza hut kyun leja raha hai........
Sardarji: Kyun key pizza hut mein "Delivery Free" hai.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa enters shop shouts, Where is my free gift with this oil?
Shopkeeper: Iske Saath koi gift nahin hai bhai saab
Santa : Oye ispe likha hai CHOLESTROL FREE.
------------ --------- --------- ----
One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Santa: Any great man born in this
village?
Santa: no sir, only small Babies!!!
------------ --------- --------- ----
Teacher: A for?
Santa: Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Santa: Jay mata di.
------------ --------- --------- ----
American says: " US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai.."
Santa says: " India me to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa orders pizza.
Waiter: Sir shud i cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces?
Santa: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u?
Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
------------ --------- --------- ----
Banta: Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha, har baar lagta hai jaise usko vapas karne aya hai.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa sitting on the top of the mountain and studying.
When a person asked what he was doing?
He replied, Oye! Higher studies yaar.
------------ --------- --------- ----
2 sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
1st Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
1st Sardar: Even i did the same thing, now teacher will think that we both copied.
------------ --------- --------- ----
A sardar learning english introduces his family in the party:
Hi! I am sardar,
this is my sardarni,
he is my kid,
& she is my kidney.
------------ --------- --------- ----
Santa: I'm very kanjoos, I went 2 honeymoon alone & saved 1/2 money.
Banta: You r nothing I saved all my money, my friend was going & I sent my wife with him.
.


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Sports Cars on Road


 

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SUICIDE..................(strictly for weak hearted ppl ;-) )



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Jiha Khan



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Vintage Gadgets




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Friday, January 29, 2010

Test for Idiocy



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Charmi





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Let’s find out just how clever you really are….
First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?

Answer:
If you answered that you are first, then you are absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person, you take his place, so you are second!

Try not to screw up next time.
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are…?

Answer:
If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?

You’re not very good at this, are you?
Third Question:
Very tricky arithmetic!
Note: This must be done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it.. Now add another 1000 . Now add 30 . Add another 1000 .. Now add 20 .. Now add another 1000
Now add 10 .. What is the total?


Answer:
Did you get 5000? The correct answer is actually 4100.
Fourth Question:
Mary’s father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the ! name of the fifth daughter?

Answer:
Did you Answer Nunu? NO! Of course it isn’t.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again!

Fifth Question:
A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully
expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.
Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?

Answer:
He just has to open his mouth and ask… It’s really very simple…. Like you!


 


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Vintage Stewardess Photos




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